Understanding Emotional Triggers and How to Heal Them

Have you ever found yourself reacting strongly to something that seems small or insignificant? Maybe someone says something, and suddenly, you’re angry, sad, or anxious, and you don’t even know why. That’s the power of emotional triggers—they sneak up on us and bring up feelings we didn’t even know were there.

Let’s dive into what emotional triggers are, why they happen, and how you can start healing them to feel more grounded and in control of your emotions.

What Are Emotional Triggers?

Emotional triggers are like little landmines buried in our subconscious. They’re sensitive spots tied to past experiences, often painful ones. When something in the present reminds us of that past hurt, it “triggers” an emotional reaction. These can range from anger, fear, and sadness to even shame or guilt.

For example, imagine a friend cancels plans last minute. If you’ve ever felt abandoned or unimportant in the past, this small event might bring up feelings of rejection or insecurity. Even though your friend’s intention probably wasn’t to hurt you, the emotional response is very real.

Why Do Triggers Happen?

Triggers are often connected to unresolved emotional wounds. These wounds might come from:

• Childhood experiences: Being criticised, ignored, or unsupported.
• Past relationships: Feeling betrayed, rejected, or unloved.
• Traumatic events: Experiencing moments of deep fear, loss, or hurt.

Your brain remembers these events and creates patterns to protect you. So when something even remotely similar happens, your body goes, “Oh no, not this again!” and reacts as though it’s happening all over again.

Common Emotional Triggers

Some triggers pop up more often than others. Here are a few examples:

• Feeling ignored or dismissed.
• Being criticised or compared to others.
• Situations where you feel out of control.
• Someone raising their voice.
• Fear of being left out or abandoned.

Can you think of times when you’ve experienced these? Identifying them is the first step to healing.

How to Heal Emotional Triggers

Healing triggers isn’t about avoiding them (let’s be real, life happens!). Instead, it’s about understanding them and learning how to respond instead of react. Here’s how you can start:

1. Identify Your Triggers

Pay attention to moments when you feel a strong emotional reaction. Ask yourself:

• What just happened?
• What emotion am I feeling?
• Does this remind me of something from my past?

Journaling these moments can help you spot patterns.

2. Sit With Your Emotions

When you’re triggered, it’s tempting to shove the feelings down or react impulsively. Instead, take a deep breath and sit with the emotion. Ask yourself:

• Why does this hurt so much?
• What is my inner self trying to tell me?

This isn’t about judging your feelings; it’s about understanding them.

3. Reframe the Story

Often, our triggers are tied to stories we’ve told ourselves, like “I’m not good enough” or “People always leave me.” Challenge those stories by asking:

• Is this absolutely true?
• What evidence do I have to support or disprove this?
• Can I see this situation in a different light?

Reframing helps you see things more clearly and with less emotional charge.

4. Practice Self-Compassion

Healing takes time, so be kind to yourself. Remind yourself:

• “It’s okay to feel this way.”
• “I’m learning and growing every day.”
• “I deserve to heal.”

Treat yourself like you would a friend going through a tough time.

5. Seek Support

Sometimes, triggers run deep, and it’s hard to work through them alone. Talking to a therapist or healer can provide the tools and safe space you need to unpack and heal these wounds.

The Beauty of Healing Triggers

Healing your emotional triggers doesn’t mean you’ll never feel triggered again—it means you’ll handle them differently. Instead of feeling overwhelmed, you’ll recognise what’s happening, pause, and respond in a way that aligns with your true self.

One client I worked with used to feel a rush of anger whenever someone questioned her decisions. Through our work, she realised this stemmed from her childhood, where her opinions were often dismissed. Over time, she learned to validate her own choices and respond calmly instead of defensively. The transformation was incredible—her relationships improved, and she felt more confident than ever.

Take the First Step

You don’t have to let your triggers control you. By becoming aware of them and taking small, consistent steps to heal, you’ll create space for more peace, joy, and connection in your life.

If you’re ready to dive deeper into this journey, reach out—I’d love to guide you through healing your emotional triggers and stepping into your most empowered self. Contact me today to book a session or learn more.